In December of 2009 the stars aligned.
One: I realized I was getting winded just walking up the stairs to our second floor apartment.
Two: I had a pregnancy scare. My main thoughts during those two or three days of uncertainty were not “can we afford a baby?” or “are we ready for a baby?”
More like “OK, if there’s a human attempting to grow inside me, have I given it anything of actual nutritional value yet? When was the last time I had a vegetable?”
And that was rock bottom. I was 204 pounds.
Once I confirmed that I was not pregnant, I went to a Weight Watchers meeting that night. December 27, 2009.
I remember my mother commenting that I must be serious if I’m not waiting until New Year’s Day like the rest of humanity.
I lost 40 pounds in 2010.
That picture was taken in July 2010 at about 170 pounds. I lost a few more pounds after that, but that’s still my favorite “skinny” picture. I just look so danged happy.
By the end of 2010 I was pregnant for real. My weight at delivery in August 2011 was 210. For the last two years I’ve tried to find that motivation again.
I guess it’s possible that somewhere in the back of my mind, this could be another pre-pregnancy health kick. But I kind of hope not.
Not that I don’t want another child. I do. Eventually. Maybe even more than one more.
But this time, I want to be doing this for me first. I know it will benefit my family as well, but I want to be able to do this for ME. For MY health.
Because I’M important.